there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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