Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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