There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Randomize
