I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize