I'm drive I can fine osifer
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
Randomize
