Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize