Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
