The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
Randomize
