She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
