I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
