That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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