Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
Randomize