That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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