Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
You made out with two different species that night
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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