i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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