just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize