Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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