well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize