Your mouth is God's brothel.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize