There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
