god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
