they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
