Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
