I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
