True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
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