Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
