No, you can still breathe under the balls.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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