watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
