oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Turns out she left way earlier. So I'm stuck with this guy asking where he can score meth and if I'm really straight.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
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