sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize