I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
Randomize
