i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
We need to rekindle our bromance
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
Randomize
