lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
