My brain says no but my pants say off.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize