let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
