At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
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