whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
