Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize