I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize