If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
my poor anus
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
