"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
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