We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
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