Taylor Swift is so right about you.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
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