So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
