Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
