It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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