Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
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