Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
