Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize