I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Randomize
